My BitterSweet Corner

Everything Happens for a Reason

I just had one of the worst experiences in my entire life. I never thought that I would come to a point of feeling this shameful and doubtful towards myself.

Everything went according to plan in the beginning. I woke up early, had my favourite breakfast, carried out my mother’s orders, took a bath, and dressed up appropriately.

Afterwards, I arrived to that spot early, and got settled. The estimation began late subsequently. Then judgment arrived. Well, unfortunately for me, something went horribly and unexpectedly wrong; so, I have to go.

I refused to show my weakness to the public. Nonetheless, tears continued to escape my eyes uncontrollably. Good thing was, I knew how to weep silently from years of practice. I just sat there motionless while sobbing for what appeared to be like an eternity, hoping that all was just a nightmare that I would eventually wake up from. Sadly, the ugly truth manifested itself very clearly. Life is unfair; I failed something I had always been good at.

However, just when I thought that life is totally being unfair to me, realizations just dawned.

For the past weeks, I had been an ass to my family; and I wasn’t conscious at all that I was being an ass. I’ve become a self-centered bitch that thinks of nothing but, obviously, myself. Moreover, I even had it all along that I was doing something purposively. Well, I guess I was mistaken and blinded by my own ambitions.

I now know that this experience I had was a wake-up call, to reassess where I am now in my journey. Just when I thought I was moving continuously forward, I was actually just being stagnant due to my selfishness. Thus, He punished me - or rather - made me see things more clearly; that I had to regain my old self, someone who was thinking more of others than herself (come to think of it, I was more blessed before than I am now).

Probably, all I am trying to point out here is that God wouldn’t give us what we want unless we want it for the sake of others. Whether it may be for the good people or for the bad, as long as we have something in mind for their sake, that is the time that God would bless us bountifully. Albeit, if ever we only have ourselves in mind, I guess God would just give us what is enough for ourselves.

To sum it all up, I believe that God blesses us proportionately to how big or small our self-defined purpose in life is. So guys, dream big! Dream beyond the realms of your comfort zones! That way, you could see the beauty of being given with life…which is, to live a life to give life.

Earlier, I mentioned that I just had one of the worst experiences ever. Now, let me cross that word out (worst), and change it to: just had one of the best experiences ever. I also mentioned that life is totally being unfair. Again, let me cross that word out (unfair), and change it to: life is totally being rightful to me.

I am proud of the outcome of my experience. I can definitely say I am a better person for realizing my mistakes before it was too late. It is true that everything does have it’s own purpose…we just have to look closely to know what we are being taught. Just like what a wise teacher once told me, “In life, there are no mistakes..only learnings.”